The idea of the pursuit of love is full of inherent stereotypes and clichés; the way we think about romance and relationships has evolved as a concomitant factor with the development of society, its digital forces and technological paradigms. How has our conception of love changed over the years, and why?
The world has become increasingly interconnected; what would have once taken a lengthy period to secure, starting a relationship has now been transcended by the efficient, pragmatic digitalisation of communication; where we would have once expected the suitor tradition to be the standardised, dominant symbol of a blossoming romance, most of our amorous pursuits are now underpinned by an economy of effort, thanks to the relationship between man and technological advancement; phenomena such as Tinder have replaced some of the physical pursuit of finding romance with a screen of persons that one can simply dismiss or pursue. The busyness of the modern age with its pressures, deadlines and demands means many of us are seeking ‘package-deal romances’, no strings attached. Inevitably, this changes how we approach and conceptualise a potential lover and the relationship it creates. The occasions on which a person would start a relationship with a fellow human in an everyday social context seem few and far between today, or perhaps just idealistic.
Technological advancement in the digital age carries fantastic opportunities for people living in modern society, having solved many of our day-to-day restrictions and frustrations; we can reach other people with unequivocal speed and efficiency nowadays. Across wide-spanning geographies, we can begin a preliminary relationship with someone via a vehicle which a simple app store can provide. However, not only does this pose obvious risks for the young and vulnerable, but it also erodes the need to travel and pursue romance by oneself without the use of an accompanying device as a digital wingman. The majority of us avail ourselves of the plethora of benefits that, for example, a smartphone presents; our daily lives are made increasingly easier and we can rely on our technological devices for anything from ordering our organic food shopping to locating the nearest anthropology museum. In the context of romance, the idea of true love must inevitably be affected by such an evolution in the way humans pursue romantic desire through digital mediums.
The sense of spontaneity inherent in falling for somebody without the use of a digital app may seem rare for some; I posit that it is the structural elements of society and culture that have changed the need for such levels of romantic spontaneity. At our fingertips, we have access to potentially hundreds of different people with whom to start a relationship. Baudrillard made a very modern structuralist comment when he discussed simulacra, particularly with the idea that current society has replaced reality and meaning with symbols and signs; ‘human experience is of a simulation of reality’. The phenomenon that is digitalised communication, social media and interconnectedness has blurred much of the distinction between real world experience and the technological experience. Perhaps the effects of a potential singularity are being felt more strongly now that we have entered the age in which digitalised versions of love – or at least something resembling it - are increasingly the norm. The younger generation will be further engulfed in societal pressures that demand efficient and speedy solutions to personal needs and desires. The sui generis nature of human technology provides a unique means of pursuing love and romance, but is it a healthy means? Surely it would be a shame should the phenomenology of pursuing relationships be suffocated or relegated by the customs of modern technological usage.
The developments that will emerge in the context of human relationships and digital advancement will be fascinating for those interested in how far technology will go in catalysing human experiences. Whatever the case, the pursuit of romance is key to human sociality and contentedness; what is interesting is how our conceptions of love will shift as the possibilities that technology affords continue to grow.